Yesterday was Good Friday. We recognize Good Friday to remember the day that Christ was crucified. Tomorrow, we will celebrate Easter Sunday, remembering Christ’s resurrection and victory over sin and death. Saturday, the day in the middle of Jesus' death and resurrection, is where we sit today. Today, we look back and are excited about tomorrow. However, today, as I reflect, I want to place myself in the shoes of the apostles and the rest of Jesus’ followers. What has happened to them? Where did they go? What are they feeling? These men and women have followed Jesus. They have listened to His teachings and believed that He was the Savior and the Messiah of their people. They thought they were prepared to follow Him anywhere.
Now what?
Peter’s last memory of Jesus is denying Him. John watched Jesus suffer on the cross. In the chaos, each follower was reacting to the crazy circumstances, but now things have slowed down enough that they can process what has happened and think about what will happen next.
Think of the situation that the followers of Jesus are now in. They had followed Jesus, who was a threat to pharisaical power, and also a threat to the Roman Empire because of His preaching about the Kingdom of God. If they were willing to crucify Jesus, what would they do to His followers? Would they be hunted down? Would they be imprisoned, tortured, murdered?
Jesus’ followers likely also struggled with internal turmoil. We know the disciples struggled with this at some level. They did not believe the women when they gave them the message of the resurrection. Even when Jesus appears to the disciples, they are afraid and believe he is a spirit. Thomas gets a new nickname (Doubting Thomas) because he refuses to believe, even after every other disciple had seen Jesus. The questions that would have been hammering on their minds: “Was He really the Messiah?” “Have I not only wasted my time, but ruined my life?” “What happens next?” “Do I believe anything that Jesus said?” When faced with crisis and collapse, do they begin to “deconstruct” their faith? The doubts and fears that would have swirled around in their heads and hearts are almost unimaginable.
But Sunday was still coming.
This period of their deepest darkness, deepest fear, deepest doubt would not last long. Jesus rose again on Sunday morning. Death couldn’t hold Him. Peter and John receive word that the tomb is empty. They ran to the tomb to see for themselves. It was at this moment that they finally understood what Jesus was teaching when He had said that He would die and be resurrected. John 20:8-10 describes the reaction of Peter and John when they find Jesus' tomb empty.
“Then went in also that other disciple which came first to the sepulchre, and he saw, and believed. For as yet they knew not the scripture, that he must rise again from the dead. Then the disciples went away again unto their home.”
The walk home must have been wildly different from the run to the tomb. The swirling chaos in their hearts and minds is suddenly gone! Finally, they understand the full purpose of Jesus’ ministry and teaching. They can look back on the darkness and see that they did not endure Jesus’ greatest failure, but His greatest victory!
Today, as we reflect on the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus, let’s recognize the fear, chaos and darkness that surrounded the cross, and can surround our lives. Do not rush past the moments of fear and doubt. Why did the apostles and followers of Jesus have to experience this day of darkness? Why should we have to experience moments of darkness? I would give two reasons to spend time today working through the crisis and collapse that the followers of Jesus endured.
First, understanding the depths of darkness without Christ shows us just how necessary our faith is and how dependent upon Christ we are.
Second, feeling the pain and loss of our Savior in a very real way allows us to better understand and respond in worship to His resurrection and victory over sin and death.
The darkness of that day was overwhelming. The hopelessness, doubt and fear were consuming, but the story was not over. Sunday is still coming.
Serving Together,
Brother Tyler